PRECISELY —:—:— CET NO SURPRISES SINCE 1847 · NEUTRAL ON EVERYTHING EXCEPT YOUR DECIMAL POINTS

Chartered Accountants of Exceptional Punctuality

Precision
you can audit.

Founded on a principle so Swiss it required its own committee: every franc, rappen, and imaginary deduction accounted for, reconciled, and filed three minutes before it was due.

Book a consultation

Fees accrued while you read this page

CHF 0.00000

Rate: CHF 0.017 / sec Billed to the nearest thought

Services rendered

Schedule A
01

Auditing of Your Life Choices

A full-scope review of decisions made since your last fiscal year, cross-referenced against decisions you meant to make.

CHF 450 / hr
02

Tax Optimisation for Imaginary Income

Structuring hypothetical earnings across jurisdictions that may not exist, for maximum theoretical efficiency.

CHF 380 / hr
03

Aggressive Neutrality Consulting

We take no side in any dispute, including disputes about whether we should take a side. Retainer required.

CHF 520 / hr
04

Cuckoo-Clock-Based Deadline Enforcement

A small mechanical bird informs you, on the hour, of exactly how overdue your paperwork has become.

Included
05

Fondue-Related Expense Categorisation

Is it a client dinner, a team offsite, or simply cheese? Our proprietary framework settles it by weight.

CHF 210 / hr
06

Emotional Support Ledgers

For clients who find spreadsheets soothing. We provide the spreadsheet. You provide the feelings.

By appointment

About the firm

Note 12

De Vreese Treuhand AG was established in a year we have since rounded, for consistency, to the nearest decade. Since then, we have not once been surprised — by a market, by a client, or by the weather, which we also reconcile quarterly.

Our partners are trained in the old tradition: three-piece suits, unreadable handwriting, and a constitutional inability to leave a column unbalanced. We answer to no shareholders, only to the ledger, and the ledger is never wrong.

We are, as a matter of policy, neutral on all matters — except punctuality, decimal places, and the correct way to fold a receipt.

"We didn't choose precision. Precision chose us, filled out the correct form in triplicate, and had it notarised." — Founding Partner, De Vreese Treuhand AG

Client remarks

Appendix C

"They found a discrepancy of four rappen in my 2019 accounts and would not discuss anything else until it was resolved. I respect that."

— A Client, Zug

"I asked for a rough estimate. They sent back an estimate accurate to six decimal places and a stern note about the word 'rough.'"

— A Client, Lugano

"My invoice arrived at 08:59:58, three seconds before their own stated deadline. I have never trusted anyone more."

— A Client, Basel

Get in touch

Schedule D

Office

Somewhere very tidy, Switzerland

Hours

Precisely on time, every time

Correspondence

By carrier pigeon, notarised fax, or extremely formal letter only